My church

Frances Young describes how she found ‘wonderful friendships and deeply spiritual connections’ at Kirknewton and East Calder Parish Church.

I JOINED Kirknewton and East Calder (KNEC) in 2003. My husband, John, and I had come from a big city centre church in Edinburgh where he had been Session Clerk and I had been House Groups Coordinator. We naively thought our new church would be delighted to have us and fall over backwards to use our skills and experience. However, we had misjudged the axis between city centre and village life.

Our old church had had a vigorous flow-through of students and tourists of all nationalities, plus people drawn to the capital city for career opportunities. Our new church had none of that in 2003. What it did have was a lot of people who had been in this same church for decades, some having brought up their children in it, some having themselves been children in it.

John and I were welcomed politely and generously, but it soon became clear that we would have to be patient and work our way into the programmes and routines, proving ourselves by steadfast and humble commitment over a period of several, maybe many, years. John is a much more patient individual than me and he accepted this challenge; I soon became impatient for a way to serve and, after three years, I left the church for about 18 months. During that time, I ‘visited’ other local churches of various denominations, seeking to find the place God was calling me to be and serve in. I found several whose worship and welcome could not be faulted but still I found no sense of belonging or calling.

“ Our old church had had a vigorous flowthrough of students and tourists of all nationalities, plus people drawn to the capital city for career opportunities.

It took the tragic death of my prayer partner (herself a long-serving member of KNEC) in 2008 to draw me back. As I did my best to support her in her terminal illness, I found I wanted to be with those who knew her best, her church family. After her death, the calling from and closeness to God that had sustained me during those hard months continued. I knew then that I was meant to be a member of this church, to have a meaningful role in it.

As the years have gone by, I can look back on a range of involvements from hamming it up onstage at the summer Holiday Club to editing the church magazine, from leading a house group to leading prayers at Sunday services, from making pancakes at our Christmas or Easter Fairs to ‘doing the Children’s Address’. Like so many of my fellow churchwomen, I am a ‘Jill of All Trades’! It is all very satisfying, deepening my faith in and commitment to Christ, whilst at the same time forging some wonderful friendships and deeply spiritual connections.

When my husband recently died suddenly, I plumbed the depths of these connections and friendships. And they were not found wanting. The support, love, prayer, and kindness have been amazing, and his funeral a truly celebratory witness, just as he always wanted.