Life & Work Magazine
Life & Work Magazine


15 mins

We are not enemies

LAST month (January) saw the beginning of a new administration in the USA following four years under the presidency of Donald Trump.

The past four years have been turbulent. Who knows what the next four will bring? Ministers and staff from the US within the Church of Scotland and others who serve with the Presbyterian Church (USA) have come together to describe their hopes and fears for the future of their homeland.

The Rev Stewart Weaver, minister at Edinburgh: Portobello and Joppa.

“A yearning has often surfaced when watching the lives of my American family and friends unfold. The inability to celebrate together the joys of weddings or births, or share in the losses of bereavement or broken relationships, can hurt.

“Much the same applies when watching recent events in the US. It’s like thinking about a person struggling, and thus praying for light and grace in a time of turbulence.

A yearning for healing.

“Recent events have not arisen in a vacuum. Trips to the US over the course of two decades have thrown the changes into sharp relief. Conversations suggest people living in the same nation but in diff erent universes.

“I hope and pray that the words used now in the US are those of wisdom and healing, words hewn from the rich vein of US history, literature and faith. I hope and pray that the course now is set with humility. I hope and pray that we in Scotland support those working to heal, and in so doing remain aware of the faith, love and hope, as well as the patience, understanding and compassion, so important for a healthy public life.”

The Rev Teri Peterson, minister at Gourock: St John’s.

“I think it’s safe to say that the divisions in the United States are deep and presenttense, and will not be easily plastered over. “Indeed, it actually feels a little bit trite to talk about ‘healing’ when that carries implications of restoration to a previous health that I’m not sure has ever truly existed. From the inception of the nation, it has carried an illness (white supremacy and a sense of exceptionalism) that has inexorably led to this brokenness. Should that brokenness be healed if it means simply returning to the way things used to be?

”In this US Presidential election there was so much talk about who can unite us. Who can unite us? No president can unite us. No prime minister can unite us. We have to unite ourselves. We have to become the people we have been waiting for.

“Pretending the problem of white supremacy and nationalism does not exist will only allow it to grow (as has happened for the past 50 years when many thought we had made great strides). Now that we can see plainly that much of that progress was an illusion, there is hope for real change.

Much like South Africa needed truth in order to have reconciliation, the same is true in the USA. And there has not been very much truth-telling there.

“Perhaps the fact that so much division is now visible to the white gaze, where it used to be hidden (but still present, and always visible to non-white people), is actually a good thing. It allows us to honestly see how much work we have to do, and to do it for real this time rather than just with a few words that are nothing more than a cheap plaster that does nothing for true healing.

“The current situation feels so destabilising, but maybe that’s exactly what the USA needs if it is to truly achieve a society of ‘liberty and justice for all’ and not just some. So I hope President Biden won’t rush to ‘healing’ but will fi rst encourage some soul-searching and truth-telling, so that the healing that eventually comes will be on a cellular level and not just skin-deep.”

The Rev Sang Cha, minister of Alloa: St Mungo’s.

“In the 1980s I grew up in this very racist part of New Jersey. The neighbourhood at that time was predominantly Irish-Italian Catholics and our family was one of few East-Asian Protestants. So there were the racist slurs and the bigoted taunts and the bloody playground fi ghts. I lost many of them but I have always been fearless in battle. Stay down! But I would get up. Always and again. But after the fi ghts, win or lose, a great many of my perceived enemies and I became friends.

“I want to make my political commitments clear. As a dual citizen of the USA and UK, I defer to no one in my love for both nations and for Christianity. I have devoted my life to the study of all three of them. I have tried to live up to my love for them. As a Tory in this country and a life-long Republican who cannot vote for my party for the time being, I can unequivocally say that the 74 million people who voted for President Trump cannot be my enemies – for amongst them I fi nd life-long friends whom I love. Always and again.

“An eye for an eye. A pound of fl esh. Yet these things will not do, Jesus tells us. Jesus is saying: Life is complicated. It is not binary. Jesus is saying: Love your enemies.

“There they stand. His words: stark, simple, demanding. Love. Your. Enemies.

“Healing is the recognition of the other person: Why is she or he feeling this way? As President-Elect Biden said in his victory speech: Let’s give each other a chance.

“In this US Presidential election there was so much talk about who can unite us.

Who can unite us? No president can unite us. No prime minister can unite us. We have to unite ourselves. We have to become the people we have been waiting for.

“I am praying for us.

“It is tempting to just say, we are through with each other. We are done. We are fi nished. But Jesus Christ teaches us that nothing is fi nished until it is complete. For ours is a faith seeking understanding.

“Stay down! “But we shall, as the people of the United States of America, rise once more to the occasion. We will unite us to heal us. Always and Again.”

The Rev Holly Smith, minister at Mid Deeside in Kincardine and Deeside.

“Two years ago, when my husband, children, and I boarded an airplane destined for Scotland, I felt nothing but relief. While leaving our families broke our hearts, we realised that in many ways our separation from them happened long before that day.

“Our parents fall politically opposite us, always seemingly choosing to disregard our fears and discomforts for their own ideologies.

We wanted gun reform, racial equality, and an end to educational poverty. They wanted the right to keep their fi rearms, feared losing their jobs to minorities, and felt like educational reform contributes to freeloading.

“Before 2016, these diff erences appeared to stay ever so slightly beneath the surface, allowing us to still gather in peace and celebration. Trump’s election changed everything. He gave those with selfi sh and hateful ideologies a platform and, for the fi rst time in my life, I became ashamed of where I came from.

“When Biden won the presidency, I felt like I could release the breath I had been holding for the last four years. I pray that because Biden falls in the moderate category, he can help Americans once again fi nd common ground, and the country will begin to heal. I hope he can help pass legislation that builds bridges and tears down walls. I hope he will reach across the aisle and encourage legislation that helps the least of these.

“I hope Congress begins to stand up to big corporations and lobbies, and fi nally says out loud that the USA is not for sale to the highest bidder. I want everyone to be able to go to the doctor or hospital without fear that they will be turned away or go hungry because of medical bills.

“Perhaps now, for the fi rst time in US history, little girls, especially little brown girls, will be able to see themselves in positions of leadership when they look up to Vice President Kamala Harris. American children are often told that they can be anything when they grow up, but with a lack of women in leadership, girls settle for less.

“I hope the memory of children hiding quietly in the corners of their classroom during armed intruder drills will fade into the history books as a child’s right to life becomes more important than the right to own an assault rifl e.

“May 2021 be the year that America takes responsibility for its actions.”

The Rev Tara Granados, minister at Glasgow: Ibrox.

“On Facebook I’ve seen several friends who veered off at some point to what seems to me like conspiracy, hypocrisy, alternative facts land… and I don’t know how to reach them anymore. One friend was in our wedding party. Another was with me as a teenager when my mother took her last breath. I feel like they’ve slipped through my fi ngers when I wasn’t looking.

“Marriage researcher John Gottman describes the way couples get into an ‘absorbing state of negativity’ as the ‘roach motel’. You check in, but you can’t check out. And you can’t absorb any compliment or positive interaction with your spouse, because you are so on guard against them.

So if they say, ‘Wow, you look really nice today’ your fi rst thought is, ‘Oh, so I didn’t look good yesterday, is that it?!’ “I say this because I fi nd myself battling against this ‘roach motel’ mentality myself.

The political divide is more a chasm these days and seems only to be growing wider as we subscribe to diff erent news outlets that present diff erent facts and narratives.

Over time we begin to operate in diff erent realities and without any shared experience or agreed history, communication seems ill-advised, futile.

“I grapple with disappointment in this election. It was so close and we are so divided. I am no longer stunned as I was four years ago, but saddened that so many fellow citizens felt President Trump’s behaviour was worthy of four more years. I am angry, disappointed, and tired. I am battling cynicism, of writing people off , cutting them out, because I cannot bear to be hurt again.

I wonder if they feel the same about me.

“Healing, if that’s what we really want, is long, tedious hard work. In a relationship, both have to want it. Both have to come to the table and listen at least as much as they speak, seek to understand and not just be understood. My honest confession is that I’m not sure I do want that right now. I don’t know if I’m up for it. Not while I see abusive, negligent, unethical behaviour continuing.

“But then I am reminded of a prophetic word from the Nassar family and the Tent of Nations, who have experienced far more abuse and betrayal than me. Their refrain has been ‘we refuse to be enemies’. Which reminded me of Biden’s words, ‘we may be opponents, but we are not enemies’.

Before we can come to the table we have to believe that.

“I’m not there yet. Maybe you’re not either.

I want to want to come to the table. I am working to claw my way back from the roach motel so one day I can engage without seeing the other person as my enemy. After all, Jesus did say we should love our enemies as ourselves. Maybe this sacred inner work is how we begin to do that.”

”Healing, if that’s what we really want, is long, tedious hard work. In a relationship, both have to want it. Both have to come to the table and listen at least as much as they speak, seek to understand and not just be understood.

Julia Cato, a graduate probationer at Edinburgh: Marchmont St Giles

“‘How do you think it will go?’ a friend asked a week before the 2020 US General Elections. ‘I have no idea’ was my honest reply. I sighed with what I realised was almost defeat. I already had the sense that no matter how the elections would go, no one would come away a winner. There was too much divisiveness and too much harm done. A few weeks on, Joe Biden’s win feels more like a reprieve than a victory.

“I grew up on a military base.

“I remember my German mother’s quiet discomfort with this morning ritual of school children pledging their allegiance to a fl ag.

“I can still recite the Pledge of Allegiance by heart. Not only did we pledge allegiance to the fl ag, but also ‘to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all’.

“President Biden will lead a country greatly divided. While many will celebrate the new administration with its fi rst woman of colour Vice President, millions will not. If there is to be true and lasting change, the new President and his administration will have to push forward in new ways, not fall back on institutionalised patterns.”

Michelle Brown is a Family Worker at Edinburgh: Portobello and Joppa.

“Last year my family went home for Christmas. We took a trip to Philadelphia and went to the National Constitution Center. There was a show where the actor gave a moving presentation of the history of the Constitution and the great American quest for freedom. As the music swelled and images of the Founding Fathers surrounded us, I could feel goose bumps on my arms.

Then my nine-year-old son whispered: ‘Mum, I am proud to be an American!’ Later my children danced under the largest American fl ag we have ever seen which hangs in the museum.

“This museum features a time when America was founded on noble ideals for a more perfect union, including those mentioned in the preamble of the constitution for justice, domestic tranquillity and general welfare. The America of 2019, did not match up to this vision our Founding Fathers had fought for.

“In 2016, when President Trump won the election, he had made promises of building a border wall. He kept those campaign promises, except the wall runs through states, towns, extended families, and kitchen tables. Four years later, we are a much more divided nation and many American people are hurting from the lasting negative eff ects of this administration.

“In 2020, my son paid close attention to the election. Eight years from now he will vote in his fi rst presidential election. I hope for him that he knows his vote matters.

However, as election results were challenged and the peaceful transition of power delayed, our democracy stood on crumbling ground. Voters for either candidate became more entrenched in their sides of the walls which divide our country. President Biden and Vice President Harris have a diffi cult path ahead to lower the temperature of anger and hostility within our nation. I pray for better days. I hope my son will continue to be proud to be American and that this new presidency will restore my hope in America.”

The Rev Laurene LaFontaine, minister at Aberdeen: Kingswells

“I can clearly remember various political moments as if they were yesterday. Meeting Congresswoman Geraldine Ferraro, the fi rst woman Vice President nominee of an American major party; shaking hands with both Bill and Hillary Clinton after getting up at 4:45am on election day; the roar of 80,000 people when Senator Barack Obama accepted the nomination for Democratic nomination for President in 2008; meeting Vice President Joe Biden in 2012; and the haunting election night of November 8 2016.

”In 2020, my son paid close attention to the election. Eight years from now he will vote in his fi rst presidential election. I hope for him that he knows his vote matters.

“That night, as results were reported, a growing angst and dread overtook the anticipation and excitement many Americans felt earlier in the day. When it was clear a win was unattainable, I went to bed. I was utterly devastated, along with at least 63 million other Americans and countless others across the globe. Hillary Clinton would not be the 45th President of the United States, and our worst nightmare had begun.

“This nightmare has included children being taken from their parents at the Mexican border, a Muslim travel ban executive order, impeachment, withdrawal from the Paris Climate Agreement, and an America First agenda. Unimaginable damage to American democratic fabric has occurred.

“I am cautiously optimistic. Joe Biden is the right person for this challenge. He is centre-left with considerable experience and a rich history of bringing diverse perspectives together. He is a team player who surrounds himself with bright people who are often much smarter than he is.

His selection of Kamala Harris was wise and bold. Joe Biden is a good man guided by a strong faith, an openness to learning, and an inclusive understanding of justice.”

The Rev John Carswell, minister at Hamilton: Cadzow.

“After 12 years in Scotland, this is an America I no longer feel qualifi ed to speak about, an America that is bitterly divided, that is no longer rooted in mutual trust and forbearance, that is consuming itself and fi ghting a civil war in all but name, a nation that has ruined its international diplomatic and democratic credibility. While the political divisions in America have been simmering for decades, Trump exploited those divisions and turned a nation against itself.

“My greatest fear for America is that verbal violence will spill over into actual violence.

There are numerous examples of this happening on a small scale, but the potential is there for something much worse. Every month of the pandemic Americans have set new records for gun sales.

“The divisions in America are profound and cross racial, economic, geographic and political lines, so much that even the pandemic was politicised. They will not heal in one presidency, especially when the outgoing president retains such a large and loyal following.

“I heard a podcast recently in which a Sri Lankan writer was comparing America to Sri Lanka during its civil war in the 1980s.

He argued that America is not headed to a civil war, but that it is already at war. “I fear Biden will not be able to fi x this.”

This article appears in the February 2021 Issue of Life and Work

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  COPIED
This article appears in the February 2021 Issue of Life and Work